C-Store Hell

Fuck My Job

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 23:37:13 GMT

I think i have a new one so mine can go to hell!!!
I think i get to quit tomorrow so FUCK MY JOB!!!!!
oh hell yes
anyway, back to work.

Amused

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 04:10:29 GMT

Your results:
You are Will Riker

Will Riker		95%
James T. Kirk (Captain)		75%
Mr. Scott		75%
Spock		74%
Mr. Sulu		70%
Jean-Luc Picard		70%
Geordi LaForge		70%
An Expendable Character (Redshirt)		60%
Leonard McCoy (Bones)		50%
Beverly Crusher		50%
Worf		50%
Deanna Troi		50%
Data		49%
Uhura		45%
Chekov		25%

At times you are self-centered
but you have many friends.
You love many women, but the right
woman could get you to settle down.

Click here to take the Star Trek Personality Quiz

The best way to tell i'm bored and waiting for my drugs to kick in. But other than being a pompous ass, rikers got a good gig...and can usually back his shit up. I'll take it. :-)

Fucking A RIGHT!

Sat, 04 Feb 2006 00:54:35 GMT

My job just went really well today. Everything fell into place and all the work I've put in over the month just paid off. There's a good chance for me to bonus this month and last month, my employees are doing the right shit, and my theft is under control. Fucking Cool. I'm now celebrating with a glass of good scotch, as ms. mercedes can attest to, I don't drink the cheap shit, and this is a nice big glass cause I just had a ton of stress unloaded off of me and I look really good right now as far as corporate is concerned. FUCK YEAH!!! I was at work all day and I don't even give a fuck I'm so stoked. I still hate my job, and my employees are as dumb as rocks, but what the fuck, right? Its a damn good day.

Digital Devil Saga

Fri, 27 Jan 2006 04:37:02 GMT

Rend...Slaughter...Devour your enemies...There is no other way to survive...You cannot Escape Your Hunger...Warriors of Purgatory

This game is actually holding my interest in a time when prior to it getting to me in the mail m was about the only thing keeping me entertained (and I'm sorry but sometimes I fuzz out on her). I can't help it. I'm just having trouble getting excited/interested about anything in this town. Everytime I turn around I have a new problem at work, or another life crisis to deal with. I actually feel like the above quote from the game might be right. Do you ever get the feeling that no matter how hard you run you just stand still. I'm actually seriously thinking about just stepping sideways for just a moment...but I'm afraid of what I'll find. I think right now I've gotta kinda live minute to minute just to survive. If I look at the big picture I seriously think I might lose it. I know the steps to take and where they lead...I just have to put one foot in front of the other. Its just hard when I have all the phantom support in the world, but everyone is so far away and what I really need right now is someone to just be here, with me. Someone to help keep me on the bead through the trails. This really can't go on much longer. I actually cried myself to sleep last night...I haven't cried for a reason other than pain in years, but in the past 3 weeks i've cried just about everry other day. I'm really really burning out. And I can't get enough sleep. But for the moment, I will continue to place one foot down and then the other, and try to re-align myself with something positive inside. I think the crying is good...its just odd and scary because I really don't cry. Its not a macho thing, I just don't. Never been sure why. Usually I yawn alot and it produces the same effect. But I've actually been crying/laughing. So I'm not even totally sure what I'm feeling when it happens. I'm gonna crawl into bed for another go. Wish me luck.

I'm Gonna Get Fired

Tue, 24 Jan 2006 13:30:33 GMT

I'm going in to open the store over an hour late again. I think my drug cocktail is messed up. I feel like i've been out on an all nighter and am still drunk from the prior night. Plus I didn't get 8 hours again cause of my damn cats. I need to just come home and clean up all the papers so they have nothing to make nooise with. or lock them up. I can't even drive in right now...this is nuts.

Drugs and the Geneva Convention

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 21:33:54 GMT

I really need to make it a rule not to post after I've had a certain number of sleeping pills. I get really really silly.

Anyway: Does anyone know if cats are protected under the Geneva Convention? I need to torture them to find out where they hid my glasses. I just got them fixed a few weeks ago but while I was asleep last night they kidnapped them and now I can't find them. I'm used to waking up and discovering them under the bed or something (thats usually where they knock them to) but today they are just GONE. and I checked everywhere I would have left them, so I'm trying to get my little darlings to tell me where the put them and they just won't talk. Hence, why I'm thinking torture next. Not really sure what else to try. And now she is trying to write in my LJ. Maybe they are gonna make a robot me and take over my life. Heh, that'd be cool. I could go on vacation again.

Lover

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 08:22:51 GMT

Deleted due to excessively high content of drug induced non-sense. But i really do have a lover...and she's wonderful.

My Trip

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 03:14:21 GMT

I love all my friends who I saw...and appreciate the rest that I didn't see even more. You are the light in my tunnel. I saw a bunch of people at an old haunt of mine that are trying to get me a new job(better) and would let me move. Had dinner a few nights with my father, and am learning that despite my best efforts I am turning out more and more like him. And he gets smarter the older I get. I'm learning alot from him about how to deal with work stuff. And a certain someone who shall remain nameless and forever adored gave me two of the most fun and peaceful days i've had in over a year. If you've ever seen troy there's a seen where achilles is telling some chick that she gave him peace, sappy moment, blah blah, but you know what, I can appreciate how much that could mean. She really really has no idea how much just being with her and having a good time meant to me and did for me. It was wonderful to just be, with no pressure, no worries about what happens or doesn't. It was free. And it allowed me two days of near perfect peace. I will appreciate her forever, even if I lose touch with her. For those of you I missed, I will make special efforts to see you next time i'm in town. I'm sorry I missed you, I had some car trouble, and then spent alot more time with my dad than I meant to. But it worked out. And I have a hobby again, if I can clear the table and find a way to protect my stuff from the local monsters. but that another tale. I love you guys, and thank you. And you, specifically, I adore.

and yes I know its the same song, its been on repeat for about 6 hours in the last 3 days. for some reason 3 doors down has been making me cry since i started driving home, and this is a good thing cause I feel like its bringing me out of my depression. and thats again in large part to the mystery guest.

Corporate Can Eat My Shit

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 03:01:14 GMT

First things first:
My day clerk is pissed cause she's this store's momma and I guess I don't clean enough for her, too bad the reason is that I'm making up for:
My assistant is a fucking retard. "What we have here is a failure to communicate" (and 2 points for anyone who can tell me what movie thats from cause its making me crazy. I spend all my god-damned time fixing his fuck ups. And then he calls in sick if he works more than 40 hours in a week. He would actually be a great clerk. He cleans well, runs the register, etc. But he has no idea how to tell if my paperwork is fucked up and only knows how to do half of it anyway. But he's been witht he company 9 years so I don't even know if he's trainable. I've just got to spend the next two weeks trying anyway or i'm just not gonna get a day off again.
My night clerk is the only saving grace, only issue with her is that she is only of average intelligence, and no real experience doing a white-collar or business running job. So while she HAS to know the reason I change a policy or she throws a fit and ignores it, it usually takes me several hours to break it down to terms that she understands...which I then have to repeat over and over again until she believes me. I'm the most straight forward and up front manager they could have. I don't yell, I don't cuss AT my employees, I'm fair (i'm so fucking fair I give myself writeups when I fuck up and then let them read them so they know) and they still just won't get to the point where they realize that I'm not jerking them around. been here a few months, and have never surpised anyone with disciplinary action or a change of where they stand. They all know it perfectly clearly, they just can't take the leap into believing what I tell them is the case. Its totally fucked.

Anyway...went out of town for a few days and left clear instructions because we had an inspection from corporate, the guy who can walk up and fire my district manager(ie suit who is vp equivilent). gone 4 days and they didn't do anything on my list. ran up my labor for no forseeable gain. and when I got back my assistant had left me with each and every days worth of paperwork. to top it off i got fucked by weather so i came in late and had to close(so 1 lost day), open the next day(no sleep), spent the next day doing 10 hours of mandatory training, some of which was sprung on me after I was nice and told my assistant to come in late the next day since I came in late (trying to be a decent guy, right?) he doesn't answer his phone so I don't get to actually start on my work till 6pm yesterday. Inspection was supposed to be sometime between 8am and 3pm. At 830 I leave cause I'm so tired the room is spinng and i'm starting to hallucinate...almost kill myself some more on the drive home, and finally make it to sleep around 10. wake up too tired to move fast enough to get in till 5. and from there mad dash to make up a weeks worth of work. finally pull it off by around 1pm and start waiting because I could start on my weekly paperwork till after they showed. waited more...FUCKING ASSHOLES NEVER CAME. I have officially slept like 10 hours in 4 days, done heinous things to my body in order to try to get everything ready in time, and they can't even stop in. fuck them. I'll rant more later, but I want to make a positive post now.

I'm not supposed to be scared of anything
But I don't know where I am
I wish that I could move
but I'm exhausted and nobody understands
i'm trying hard to breath now
but theres no air in my lungs
theres no one here to talk to
and the pain inside is making me numb
i try to hold this, under control
they can't help me
cause no one knows

Changes - 3 Doors Down

Just the start of the song, but the song is really ringing true to me right now.

Fuck my Job

Tue, 17 Jan 2006 03:39:20 GMT

So Saturady I have classes all day on top of the normal bullshit. Sunday I have to work 18 hours cause my assistant is sick. Monday he won't come is cause he's still gonna be sick, so i'm opening againl. now the son of a bitch calls off on tuesday so I have to go in to open. this is so much bull shit. FUKC MY JOB. I'm going to have put in 40 hours in the first 3 days of the week. and I'm gonna take mytwo days off whether they like it or not, so they bettter hope he's better by then. FUK THEM. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Automatic Respons

Mon, 16 Jan 2006 07:26:37 GMT

How is it that when a person comes to the counter, drops their stuff of, and I ask "Is that gonna be all for you today?" they answer "yes" and then proceed to tell me the other 3 things they need to buy. I mean what the fuck, is the questoin not clear enough. do i need to use ghetto speak, or maybe just be rude "are you fucking finished shopping?". I just don't get it.

Side note: My assistant contineus to cause more problems than he appears to be worth. Shows up to work on time today, to tell me he's sick and can't work. Thanks jackass for giving me some time to get someone to come in. To top it off I opened (5am) worked through close (11pm) and then had to drop off my paperwork at teh foffice. He misses many more shifts he's fire.
Ok, the hallucinations are kick in, must get in bad. Later all.

Ps.S any suggestions on cat discipline greae appreiatedd.

Life's little annoyances.

Thu, 12 Jan 2006 02:41:40 GMT

Well, I guess my sense of humor is officially fucked up. I have now pissed off two people in a week when I was just playing around. Neither of them are people I want mad at me so I had to apologize to both of them. Am I just really caustic, or am I suffering from a case of assholism? This isn't really a problem I've had before. Anyone who can chime in I'd appreciate.
Other joys from the day was spending half an hour arguing with my clerk about how I wanted something done. It just wouldn't sink in that yes, I understand how she does it now, but I keep having lottery tickets disappear so I want it done my way. No, I do understand why you do it your way, but that's not how I want it done. Yes I understand that when the next manager comes to the store they will want something different. If you want to make policy GET A FUCKING PROMOTION!!! Until then last time I checked my name tag said store manager so shut the fuck up and do what you're told. ARGH!!! I have a meeting and they don't do anything but argue with me. Its really getting on my nerves. I almost want to fire them all so I can just train some fresh blood the way I like them. I don't ask for much. Help me deal with corporate bull, be honest, show up for work, and do your job. If you do those things I'm the easiest guy to work for, I'll take hits for you, I'll stick my ass out for you, and I'll do everything I can to make your job easier. But this is bullshit. I've been taking flak over their shit for a month now and I try to change a few procedures so that we can stop getting chewed and they fight with me about it at every turn. Fuck this. I'm just gonna start tossing write ups around. I guess they think I'm too nice or something because I don't like writing people up. Well my age and demeanor has nothing to do with my management style. If they don't want to play ball, then they can see what the unemployment line looks like because at MY store there are only two teams...us and them. And they are either
corporate or not employed by me.
We shall see what i'll do.

Mon, 09 Jan 2006 05:12:07 GMT

I'm going to start a path to self-improvement that I hope will lead me to a better space within myself. I can't change my fucked up job, or any of my other problems right now. But I can change my and how I react to the fact that I work for a gas station. I always think that because I'm competant everyone else is as well. But it just isn't true and I have to come to terms with that. My area coach spent a few hours with me today explaining some things to me that I should have been taught months ago because managing a c-store is an experience all unto its own. Its less management and more just fucked up nazi accounting. I miss actually managing. This job is not right for me, but it serves my needs right now, and I'm going to explore whats out there. And I have stepped up and refused to be defined by my job. I'm not sure how i'm going to manage it, but I have made a decision to draw a clear line between me, and me the boss. This is a start, and while i'm doing other things as well, I don't want them spread across the net like a virus. I dearly love all of you who support me,even those who will never see this message ehre.

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 04:52:53 GMT

Justice and Morality: You believe in doing what is
right for others and maybe even for yourself.
People would consider you one with good morals,
and someone who would not let them down.

Which Characteristic From the Samurai Code Matches You Best? (You may find out your best trait)
brought to you by Quizilla

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 04:46:39 GMT

Greed:	Medium
Gluttony:	Low
Wrath:	Medium
Sloth:	Very Low
Envy:	Very Low
Lust:	High
Pride:	Low

Discover Your Sins - Click Here

I'm bored

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 04:36:15 GMT

Werewolves of folklore differ greatly from modern
renditions seen in movies and shows. People
believed there were many ways to become
werewolves, such as drinking rainwater
collected in a wolf's pawprint, eating meat
gnawed on by a wolf, or being born with a full
set of teeth or covered in a caul. And unlike
movie werewolves, werewolves of old were
oftentimes harmless and highly honorable!

As a werewolf, you are loyal, strong and honorable,
and you will protect all you hold dear with
your very life. Although you are not a violent
individual at heart, you will fight for what
you believe in. You are a good friend and truly
are a wonderful person to be around.

Who is your inner Shapeshifter?
brought to you by Quizilla

I CAN"T FUCKING SLEEP

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 04:17:56 GMT

I can't sleep. I'm tired, but no sleep comes. This is quickly getting old.

Its not even the damn clowns. I just can't sleep. I swear I will...

Never mind. Light. Peace.

Corporate Life

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 00:03:48 GMT

The life of a corporate whore is always very hectic. Yesterday I had corporate come to my store, and now I have twice as much work to do to get ready for their next visit. Apparently my store is fucked up. So not only do I have a crazy ass amount of theiving, lazy employees, but now my ass is on the wire for it. I'm also losing my day off during the week because other managers are more deserving so my assistant is getting farmed out. This is complete bullshit. But I got to talk to a friend I haven't heard from in a while so I'm in a good mood now.

The Joys of Responsiblity

Fri, 06 Jan 2006 01:59:20 GMT

I should be asleep, but as is often the case, I can't. So instead I'm sitting up listening to sad music and comtemplating things. I have to go in to work at an extra ungodly hour tomorrow because of the corporate whores I work for visiting so I have to get everything ready. My assistant continues to surprise me with his retardity as he manages yet again to be unable to spend 5 minutes to determine where the large sum of missing money went. This one took me about an hour to narrow down exactly, but only because I knew it hadn't been stolen and had to find out exactly what happened. Too bad today was my day off and I had to do this RIGHT after getting my massage. Speaking of which my massage therapist is a goddess. And cheap to boot. It was really nice, I've never had a professional massage before. I'll have to budget in to get one at least every few weeks. She's also helping me network a bit in town which is way cool. So all in all a good day. It was really ridiculous when I was getting undressed for my massage and had to empty out my pockets. I carry so much of my job with me constantly. I mean I sleep with my fucking work phone and keys. Yes I do mean literally. These two items go everywhere with me. My job actually owns me 24 hours a day. Its a really unusual feeling. I've never had an employer, no matter how much responsibility I had make me feel like this. But somehow this little podunk convience store has managed to manacle my soul. It almost makes me want to be a cubile whore again. Almost. It does spur me forward onto the get in school bus. Or something. I mean fucks sake man. This shit is aging me two days for every one I'm actually alive. See...this is why I have a bed time. When I'm up past it I start going on like this. Oh well. No one actually reads this anyway so its not as if I'm wasting anyones time but my own. And I don't have a damn thing better to do. Off to try to sleep again. Sad music is good for the soul I've decided. But only in moderation. I find joy in being sad right now, I think because it allows me to feel a color in the gray-scale of my life right now. I utterly refuse to give in to depression, and while my life is hard and exasperating, it is not bad. All I have to do now is find a way to move forward, rather than sideways.

Merry Christmas to me from Qwest

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 22:56:15 GMT

I've never been terribly impressed by the holidays, they usually seem to go wrong somehow, but this holiday season has been the worst I've dealt with. So, since my holiday has sucked so badly, rather than doing what I should do and take the money I just got from Qwest and use it on bills, or something useful, I've decided to schedule an extra session with my massage therapist, who is hot, and really cool. I also found out she does relaxing massages which is what I'm going to get, as opposed to the normal searing pain she causes trying to fix whatever part of me broke that week. She's been working on me for about month now on an old injury and is really good at what she does so I'm looking forward to my first actual professional massage for enjoyment. Today is turning out rather nicely. Now I just have to find a way to sleep.

Utilities Blow, But at least Qwest is Easy

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 22:48:05 GMT

So a few months back Qwest runs this ad offering a bunch of shit for 150 bucks a month. I look at my bill and realize that its about a hundred for just the basic phone and dsl. What the fuck? So I call Qwest up and this guy says he's gonna hook it up, that my dsl price is screwy which is why my bill is so high, etc. Mook credits me with 75 bucks so basically nixes that month's bill. Says he can't fix the monthly billing, but in December he'll credit me another 75 and that will balance out the overcharges. He also says that he's gonna "bundle" everything else up and that my bill with tax should be about 160 a month for my phone, dsl, cell, long distance, and DTV. I say "cool" thats not so bad. Get bill last month, 180. I just tell myself that its one time fees and that shit, and I can't get my direct tv installed because the person I was living with is such a fuck-tard she can't be disturbed to answer the phone before 3pm, so my installations keep getting canceled. Oh, and she's afraid the strange men in the house that are gonna install the DTV will rape her so she can't be in the house while they do it. This, to her is a much more likely scenario than them just jacking a few dvds or something on their way out the door because she wants to LEAVE THEM ALONE IN THE HOUSE FOR SEVERAL HOURS. At which point they will finish, leave, and we will have the service with no verification of how well it works or anything. Sounds like pure fucking genius right there. I veto that and dance with DTV for a few months, but I can't get her to even pass messages from their sales department to me so I just let it drop across the holidays. Today, call them up and say "I'd like to get my DTV installed." They say, you can't. We have to cancel the service request because we've been calling you for weeks and you don't call us. Me "What?!?!?" Him "We called on..." Fucking Christ. So now I have to call qwest for the second time today to get it set back up because Qwest apparently DTV's service department can't just reque the installation and still have it "bundled". This makes me feel all warm and fucking fuzzy considering I just wasted an hour on the phone finding out that I was: A. Lied to by the jackass I spoke to a few months ago. B. Not getting my 75 dollar credit. C. Going to be paying 180+ dollars every month for my services because I am not a new customer. For some fucking reason Qwest only gives deals to new customers. But since I was only ADDING OVER $100 WORTH OF SERVICES I get shit. Wow, way to go with the customer service. Plus with the bullshit with the DTV I'm probly just gonna get other providers for all my shit. Other then my cell which I got locked into for two years after a two week trail for the service. Phone works great, no problems, but I guess the trail is only two weeks so you don't get a chance to realize they fuck you on the bill. On the bright side the person I spoke to at Qwest was kind enough to walk me through the reasons I was getting fucked, apologize to me for being lied to, and credited me $30 for my aggravation. Plus the $20 they already owed me for my "free" phone. These fuckers cave faster than wet toilet paper. If i remember correctly I call them about, oh, every other month cause they've fucked something else up, and I usually walk off with a $50 credit or more. You'd think that for all the money they've had to throw at me they would just put a little star next to my bill saying "This fucker will actually call and bitch. Get his bill right!" But no, instead they keep fucking up and I keep making 50 bucks an hour to be aggravated. I guess it isn't so bad in the end. Its more than they fucking pay me at work.

So I work in Hell

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 02:57:35 GMT

So I work for the shittiest company around. Literally. You wouldn't believe what they try to pull off and continue to call themselves a "convience" store that "cares" about its employees. Yeah fuckin' right. So today I find out that after being employeed a relatively decent length of time by the company(read as more than six months) I have less than 3 days of sick time. Funny that since I, like most managers am salaried for 40 hours a week, and even though I don't believe I have ever actually put in less than 50 hours a week, my next check is going to be docked because, *gasp*, I was told by a doctor to not go to work due to some fucked up illness. And to top it off, I get back to work and find out that my assistant manager is totally incompetant and managed to allow a sizeable amount of cash walk out the door because his head was so far up his ass it didn't occur to him to wonder why a certain person's till was off for 4 CONSECUTIVE FUCKING DAYS!! A person who not days before I left sick had already been told
"You're drawer was short a lot of money. It was your drawer because nothing else (lottery tickets, gas, etc.) was missing. How the FUCK did you lose almost 100 dollars." Reply "I don't know. Thats a lot of money. But I didn't take it. I was being really careful. I don't need your money. I can get a better job." Well gee, so can I, but that doesn't explain how you manage to lose 100 dollars across 8 hours when your average transation is less than 5 dollars. That means that she would have had to give each and every customer coming through the door an extra dollar, kinda like a hey, thanks for shopping, here's a fucking prize. The chances of that happening are, well none. On the other hand, 20 bills that magically miss the safe, well shit, those happen all the time. Course it helps when you are fucking drunk at work on the malt beverage equivilent of MAD DOG that you throw away in the FUCKING EMPLOYEE TRASH CAN and then leave for ME, the BOSS to find in the morning. Funny, no bums drinking in or around my store to date, no prior alchohol on property, yet somehow some bum magically put like 6 of these things in the trash can in the employee break room. How fucking ironic is that. But hey, they are mine, they belong to the other people who've worked her for well over a year or more and have NEVER ONCE COME TO WORK SMELLING LIKE YOU JUST GOT OUT OF A FUCKING BAR. So back on topic, I come back to work, find the prior days work wasn't done because my assistant wigged out because the dollar value finally hit 50+ in one shot and wanted me to look at it. Its a 5 minute process because we have so many controls, but I guess he just wan't up to the task. And look, its drunken mook, short again. To top it off my assistant yet again fucks my by not taking care of the end of year stuff he was supposed to do so on top of spending hours backtracing a weeks worth of paperwork so I can try to not get fired for being out sick and letting my assistant fuck the store, I have to do the rest of the shit that was too complex for him, like read a diagram to put signs up. Count inventory. Fuck, most of the shit I counted required at the most wearing sandals. So me, still fucking sick, manages to wake up, go to work, and get home just in time to fall asleep right then and get 8 hours. yeah fucking right. So i go in today and spend my entire day waiting for my "experienced" clerk to get her shit done so i can get my shit done. Amazing how when your mouth is running something that can be done in an hour and a half can take four hours out of my life. I mean fuck me running man. And she's considered the competant help. To top all this off when I finally get around to firing the bitch who was steal my area coach (he manages the managers of different stores) says i'll be back before she gets here so she can sign and get fired. She shows up early, I page him, he reads me the riot act for paging him about it saying he'd get there when he said he would. I say "what do i tell her" He says "don't let her clock on and tell her to wait for me" She steps out for a smoke break, on her walk fucking home. The cocksucker doesn't even show up till 30 min after I paid him, says oh well and just presses on. And I'm like I sat the fuck around here waiting for you for what? You want her fired, you ok'd the writeup and termination, I mean what the fuck am I the manager or should I just give my keys? So now we might have possible bullshit from inappropriate documention prior to termination and other shit. Fuck that. Got lucky today though...Abdul(think simpsons except this isn't his real name) understands about half of what I say and buffs my ass the rest of the time so I won't be as pissed when he fucks up and I realize that no, he doesn't understand what I want him to do, he just doesn't want to look any dumber the he already does. I really am just gonna start taesering them. I'm out for now, I'll have more tomorrow.